Diva La Voom











{July 6, 2010}   Shopping Trips

I have a serious problem with a certain store that I went to shop at on Saturday. This store is one of those that is split down the middle, fat clothes on one side, skinny on the other. Well I headed to my section, fat clothes, except I like to call it the Sexy section. As soon as I enter I see six racks of clearance clothes! Naturally I got woozy in the head and began attacking each rack with the precision that only an experienced Diva shopper owns. I’m minding my own, smiling, talking a bit to myself when out of left field comes the “woman” who is supposed to help my with my garment buying decisions. Honey, the word woman would have to be used loosely with this girl. She couldn’t have been more that sixteen, and a size zero at that! Now, I have nothing against young, tiny girls. Wished I was one in fact, but when you send Bambi to help the hunter you are just asking for trouble! Well, Bambi comes flying over hoping to score that commission that will pay for her next manicure. With not a smile anywhere on her face, she proceeds to begin her sale. I kid you not these were her exact words: “Hi, welcome to <insert store here>. My name is Bambi. Allow me to help you. This rack (pointing to the one I was looking on) won’t have your size. Most of our really big clothing is on this rack.”

I am not lying. I couldn’t decided if I should cry from hurt or laugh at ignorance. I chose the latter. I informed her, politely of course, that indeed this rack did have my size and that she needed to brush up on her eyeballing women for their size. I pointed out that “really big” was not two words that any Diva La Voom would want to hear upon entering a store that was supposedly “dedicated to fashions for all sizes”. She decided that I was not one that she could handle if a fight began so she stared at me for a moment and then turned without saying another word and left.

Needless to say after that I thought about leaving, but decided that perhaps it wasn’t the clothing’s fault that Bambi was so uneducated. So I bought my two shirts, earrings and hair clips (buy one get one free!) and headed out the door.

So lesson learned? Not all people realize that weight is a sensitive issue. I have known this all my life, perhaps now though, Bambi will realize that Divas are humans with feelings. Maybe now she will also realize that Diva’s can choose to be hurt by thoughtless comments, like the one that slipped effortlessly though her lips, or we can rise above those comments. I think I made the right choice. I walked out that door with my head held high. As I entered the world beyond that one door, I knew that I had scored one for my team.

Love and Winks,

Miz Congeniality

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{March 4, 2007}   Therapy!

Well this diva had an interesting day. I spent most of the night puking my guts up. Then got up this morning and chugged over three bottles of water. I could not get rid of my thirst. The water left me with a sickly sloshy feeling in my cute tummy. So what could be better than retail therapy right? Right. So I headed to my local mall where I hit Lane Bryant. They were having a major sale. 40% off clearance. So I stocked up. I came up with some great longish tee shirts. And one long sexy black skirt. Naturally after clothing I hit the shoe store. I scored a fantastic pair of brown wedge heel sandals that scream for me to wear them next weekend to a friend’s birthday party. I have to say, I’m excited to see a lot of the spring fashions for curvaceous beauties. I love the decorated tanks with the swingy skirts and ballet flats. I am also in love with the handkerchief hems and embellished straps on some of the new tops. Yay spring.



{February 19, 2007}   Brit’s Bald

Well well, Miz Spears has shaved her head. Interesting. I am somewhat surprised that the two new tattoo’s were not etched on her bald scalp. I say “You go girl!” Change the hair, change the ‘tood.



{February 8, 2007}   AI steps up and offers some hope

Insomnia. I’m suffering from INSOMNIA. Lack of sleep leaves Miz really unhappy. Grouchy, short tempered. How ever you want to say it, that’s me. Nothing good on except a rare inpressive moment on American Idol. American Idol was a bit headache inducing tonight. Best over all tonight? Last chick, named..um..LaQuisha? (I’m working on getting her info). Fantastic voice! Blew the judges away. Awesome. I look forward to seeing her next week on the first HOLLYWOOD show! Whoo! She’s a Diva La Voom that we can be super proud of for representing! She’s has an adoreable little girl. Hmmm, makes this Diva want one…….now all I need is a Diva La Voom lovin’ man…..



{February 4, 2007}   Teaching Moment

Disclaimer: Diva’s can be all shapes and sizes. I mean no disrespect to thin women or to women named Bambi. Names have been changed to protect the stupid.

I have a serious problem with a certain store that I went to shop at on Saturday. This store is one of those that is split down the middle, fat clothes on one side, skinny on the other. Well I headed to my section, fat clothes, except I like to call it the Sexy section. As soon as I enter I see six racks of clearance clothes! Naturally I got woozy in the head and began attacking each rack with the precision that only an experienced Diva shopper owns. I’m minding my own, smiling, talking a bit to myself when out of left field comes the “woman” who is supposed to help my with my garment buying decisions. Honey, the word woman would have to be used loosely with this girl. She couldn’t have been more that sixteen, and a size zero at that! Now, I have nothing against young, tiny girls. Wished I was one in fact, but when you send Bambi to help the hunter you are just asking for trouble! Well, Bambi comes flying over hoping to score that commission that will pay for her next manicure. With not a smile anywhere on her face, she proceeds to begin her sale. I kid you not these were her exact words: “Hi, welcome to <insert store here>. My name is Bambi. Allow me to help you. This rack (pointing to the one I was looking on) won’t have your size. Most of our really big clothing is on this rack.”

I am not lying. I couldn’t decided if I should cry from hurt or laugh at ignorance. I chose the latter. I informed her, politely of course, that indeed this rack did have my size and that she needed to brush up on her eyeballing women for their size. I pointed out that “really big” was not two words that any Diva La Voom would want to hear upon entering a store that was supposedly “dedicated to fashions for all sizes”. She decided that I was not one that she could handle if a fight began so she stared at me for a moment and then turned without saying another word and left.

Needless to say after that I thought about leaving, but decided that perhaps it wasn’t the clothing’s fault that Bambi was so uneducated. So I bought my two shirts, earrings and hair clips (buy one get one free!) and headed out the door.

So lesson learned? Not all people realize that weight is a sensitive issue. I have known this all my life, perhaps now though, Bambi will realize that Divas are humans with feelings. Maybe now she will also realize that Diva’s can choose to be hurt by thoughtless comments, like the one that slipped effortlessly though her lips, or we can rise above those comments. I think I made the right choice. I walked out that door with my head held high. As I entered the world beyond that one door, I knew that I had scored one for my team.

Love and Winks,

Miz Congeniality

Diva La Voom Extraordinaire



{February 4, 2007}   Diva La Voom’s In The Spotlight

Hello darlings! Today has been much better for my precious soul. I want to send my praises to four wonderful actresses. These four women have given this precious Diva La Voom hope that the two little words, “plus sized”, will not cause panic, fear and lowered self-esteem in today’s young women. Let’s begin, shall we.

Sara Ramirez-Dr. Callie Torres from Grey’s Anatomy

Sara is just beautiful! She is by far my favorite female character on this fantastic show. With actresses as thin as Ellen Pompeo and Sandra Oh surrounding her, Sara steals the show! My favorite episode by far is where Sara was shown dancing in her underwear! You go girl! Shake that booty! You make us La Voom girls proud! When asked about the show here is what Sara said “”Nobody from the show said I was too heavy. Instead they wanted me to dance in my underwear.” This my darlings is why we all love Grey’s from the bottom of our hearts. With characters like “ordinary” Meredith, spicy Christina, perfect Izzy, sassy Callie, bossy Addison and “The Nazi” Bailey(another of my faves!) you just can’t lose! All these strong women, each with a special personality, each searching for something missing in their lives. With careers, friends, love and plenty of sexual tension to share, these women make Thursday nights fun! So Sara, you hang in there girl! Keep representing for the Diva La Voom girls! You’re doing a fine job!

Chandra Wilson-Dr. Miranda Bailey from Grey’s Anatomy

Dr. Bailey rocks! Chandra does a fantastic job of meshing hardcore attitude and bossy behavior with heart and life. I adore this woman, she is wonderful. Sassy Chandra began performing in musicals at the age of five with Theatre Under the Stars. (imdb.com info) This girl not only has mad crazy acting skills, but she can sing like a bird! She got to show off her skills in one episode of Grey’s where she sang to her son over the phone. Let me tell you darlings, I cried openly! This tiny, only 5′ tall, woman packs a powerful punch. Add the fact that she is also a Diva La Voom woman and wow! Stunning. Chandra, sweetie, keep up the great work! We love ya!

Jennifer Hudson-Dreamgirls and American Idol

I have not seen Dreamgirls yet, but I fully intend to watch! Diva La Voom Jennifer has got my attention! This real life Dream Girl came in a mere sixth place on Season Three of American Idol. Ms. Hudson held on to her dreams, worked hard and came up a winner! She is a wonderful woman to watch, young women pay attention! This is how you succeed!

America Ferrera-Betty from Ugly Betty

Ms. Ferrera won my heart in Real Women Have Curves. The title caught my eye, but the actress made the movie! In Ugly they have America disguised as best as they can, well, I assume that is the best they can. Her true beauty shines through! Even with terrible patterns, unflattering puffed sleeves, and braces this girl has that “it” that we all want. Side note here: what makes ABC thing that braces are ugly? There is nothing ugly about improving one’s self! Shame on you! Now, back to America, girl you got style, class and charm. Thanks for showing us that real women do have curves!

Now my darlings, I’m off to catch more gossip and form more opinions! Stay warm and keep smiling!

Love,

Miz Congeniality

Diva La Voom Extraordinaire!



{February 3, 2007}   Fantastic Friday has failed me

Welcome to Diva La Voom!

What? What is a Diva La Voom? Well allow me to educate you. A diva is defined as “a distinguished female singer.” A Diva La Voom is quite a bit different. Diva La Voom is a distinguished plus sized female who has strength, talent, attitude and love. I myself am a Diva La Voom. Would you like to join me? I thought so. Attitude is a must, my loves. Hold your head high and proclaim yourself a Diva La Voom and refuse to let anyone tell you differently.

This little blog is my place to educate, share, talk, rant and generally supply my wit and wisdom to the masses. I hope you enjoy and come visit often! I love comments and questions! More about me later, let’s get on with the program!

Friday has arrived and it lacked the luster I had anticipated. For instance, I’m in the store ready to check out and I was perusing the trashy tabloids that I dearly love, when I realize there is not a single noteworthy story on a single cover. Hollywood! You should be ashamed of yourselves! No scandal? No catfights? No big brass ball brawls? I am disapointed! I have high expectations of my celebrities! When they let me down it hurts. Due to the less than stellar reporting by the professionals I feel it is my duty to educate you, my dear readers. But as the ever so classy Scarlett O’Hara phrased it, “I can’t think about that right now. If I do, I’ll go crazy. I’ll think about that tomorrow.”

Have a wonderful night!

Winks,

Miz C.

 



et cetera